“Don’t pick him up every time he cries,” and “Do you ever put that baby down?” and “Do you want your baby to be spoiled?” are just three of the questions that moms get asked frequently. So many people believe that if a mother picks her baby up every time the child cries then it will be spoiled when the baby is older. According to www.parentingcounts.org 57% of parents of young children (age zero to six), 64% of grandparents, and 62% of future parents believe that a six-month old baby is not too young to be spoiled. That has been scientifically proven to not be true.

Picking a baby up when they are crying shows that the parent will always be there for them and promotes good attachment and security. When babies cry, it is for a certain reason and parents are taught to meet those needs. A baby cannot feed itself, change its own diaper or rock itself to sleep, so the parents have to do it for the baby. Yes, once they get older, if their parents do everything that the child asks, then the child will learn that it just has to ask and it will get what he or she wants. This is when people should worry about spoiling their baby. When children are little, their cries are because it needs their mother or father. Some may cry because the child knows that it will get their parent’s attention, but what other way do babies have to tell parents that it needs them? Instead of worrying about spoiling the baby, parents should feel honored that he or she has chosen them as their go-to person when the child needs something or just wants snuggles. Babies and children feel safest with their parents.

Skin-to-skin contact has been scientifically proven to activate nerves in the baby’s brain that contribute to brain growth and maturity. Skin-to-skin contact and just holding the baby in general whenever it wants or needs it’s parents creates a great bond between mother and child and even has greater health benefits for the child. According to www.scareymommy.com in a 2012 study from the Cochrane Pregnancy and Childbirth Group’s Trials Register, full-term babies who experienced skin-to-skin care in their early days had better cardio-respiratory stability, higher breastfeeding rates, and decreased crying. Not only that, carrying a baby for a significant portion of the day reduces the fussiness and colicky symptoms that peak at six weeks old.

Babies depend on their parents, not because the baby is spoiled, but because the baby needs its parents and the bond that has been scientifically proven very beneficial.